Get yer illicit liaisons here, ladies and gents...

This is an advertising supported journal. Scroll down for dull rambles.

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Looking for a tryst, Sir, Madam? A fling? A fumble? A quick snog in the back seat of a clapped out Mini*? Well, search no longer. I'm cheap, available and good value for money. Call 1234 567890 after 6pm Tuesday to Thursday, and ask for Madam Instant Whip.

Prices: Quick Snog - £3.50; A Bit of a Go - fiver; Full On Tryst - seven quid.

*Please provide your own clapped out Mini.
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( A disturbed night )

( Music and writing (dull) )

In other news
-- The nurse was very, very lovely and did not hurt me in any way.
-- I wish Sean Bean did voice-overs for all the adverts.
-- Everything's suddenly stopped working around here! My bloody phone won't let me delete any old messages, so how is anyone supposed to text me, hmm?
*throws stupid phone across room*

ETA: loads of italics, cos I bloody love 'em, I do.

lust/stupidity

Drabble for the lotrips100 lust challenge:

( Lycra )

I fixed my phone. The problem, I discovered, was with my brain.