sheldrake

Hello? Hello, yes, I don't know whether you can help me. I'm having a few problems with the um, 'career' I ordered from you and I'd like to send it back and go home now, please. Yes. Yes, that's right. Oh - and if possible, I'd like to spend the rest of my life in bed. Thanks. Sorry? Oh, ok.

*hums along to medley of popular TV theme tunes*

Ah, hello? Yes, hello. As I just explained, I'm calling because my job is shit and I want to go home now and never come back. Yes. Yes. Ah, I see. Hang on a minute, can I just get a pen? Thanks. Right, yes, go on. Right. Er, "I've made my bed, and ... now I've got to go away and..." Sorry, what was that? Ah, "go away and lie on it". Got it. Yes, I see. Well, thanks very much for your help. Yes. Fuck you too! Bye now!