sheldrake

I feel good today. I found a Fray Bentos pie at the back of the cupboard which I didn't know I had. To me, this is a good thing. Others may not agree.

I went out with my good friends the Evil Lesbians yesterday, so-called because they are Truly and Utterly Evil (the lesbian bit is incidental), and whenever I go out with them I end up staggeringly drunk and without the ability to talk or use my legs. I once made the mistake of spending New Year with them and couldn't move for three days.

There was an interview with the very wonderful Alan Cumming in the Observer today.

"I've thought of this thing which is: every man in the world is really into his cock. Right? You know? It's true, isn't it?
[ ...]
Right.
[ ...]
So... it's not such a big leap to think that he might be into somebody else's.
[...]
Riiight... what do you plan to do with this piece of information?
Say it. On a talk show or something. I might replace the word 'cock' with 'penis'."


I'm also becoming increasingly convinced that that paper's Barefoot Doctor column must be made up. It must be.

Reader Beverly Hall writes in for advice: "I am moving to Sheffield on Friday. I have no job to go to and while it's a strange and wonderful experience, freewheeling and trusting the universe to provide, the panic is starting to rise. Could it be my kidneys?"

Barefoot Doctor replies: "It is definitely deficient kidney energy causing you to feel anxiety and panic. This can be countered by placing the backs of your hands over your kidney area and briskly rubbing up and down for a few minutes three times a day."

Yeah right Deficient kidney energy. That's definitely what it'll be.


I was very tempted to go and play at being a Lord of the Dark in thelostland, but my brain (which is France and Germany in the UN security council of my life) vetoed the decision, reminding me about the two Big Scary Projects and their Looming Deadlines, for which I have done Absolutely No Work. *kicks brain* Stupid internal organ. You knew those were the things you were supposed to avoid thinking about.

In other news, have finished American Gods, which was wonderful, and bought Neverwhere. Why I've never read this man before I do not know.

And in other other news, you people are all incredibly cool, fantastico, sparkly, delightful and other adjectives as well. So there.