sheldrake

Ok. I went to bed at 4.45am, just as dawn was breaking. Now I don't know what's going on... all disoriented, and have to go and pay the water bill.

Read milochka's Def Poetry Viggo, yo. Or something.

hjartad and I had a pirate chat the other night.




Pirate1: Nice day, innit?

Pirate2: Mmm. Bit hot though.

Pirate1: Aye. Think I'll stand over here. There's a shadow here...

Pirate2: Arr, you've got a *shadow*? Years I've been pirating, and I never got a *shadow* before!

Pirate1: Well, now that you've stopped me, it's gone now. Can always get a good few seconds of shade if you're inthe right place at the right time.

Pirate1: um. Arr, right back atcha.

Pirate2: Well... fish for tea again?

Pirate1: Sounds good to me. Then we can just stare at the water somemore.

Pirate2: Mmm.... I like water.

Pirate2: Lots of it round here, I've noticed.

Pirate1: The stuff is everywhere. Never have a problem when it comes time to swab the deck.

Pirate2: Noooo... that's true.

Pirate2: Reminds me of a little shanty I'm writing at the moment. 'Water, water, everywhere....'

Pirate2: That's it.

Pirate1: Brilliant, matey.

Kia says:
*has no idea of how a pirate talks*

Pirate2:Arr, thanks

sheldrake says:
*has very little idea also*

Pirate1: I've written a wee one meself.

Kia says:
*is now a scottish pirate*

Pirate2: Arrr? That so, Pirate McPirate?

Pirate1: 'The ship sail o'er the sea...'

Pirate1: That's 'sailed'... forgot meself for a second there

Pirate2: Arr, that's lovely, does me old heart good.

Pirate2: I like 'em short, meself.

Pirate2: I likes me shanties like I likes me men.

Pirate2: Short.

Pirate1: Do you now? Is that why they call ye Shorty Charity Rackhem?

Pirate1: I'm a little woozy, by the way. In case you haven't noticed.

Pirate2: Now, I didn't know they called me that. Me given name is Shirley.

Pirate1: All of this... sailing and water and... Shirley, you say?

Pirate2: Arr. Surely, me name is Shirley. Why I went to sea, see? Get away from the terrible tauntin' an' name-callin'... Which is bound to start up again now, o' course...

Kia says:
*knew you would say 'surely'* *snickers*

sheldrake says:
*not obvious in any way*

Pirate1: Arrgh. *cough* Damn parrot feathers. Yeah, I came to sea for a similar reason. Me wooden leg, here. Made me life a living 'ell.

Pirate2: Arr? Did they call you 'Stumpy Sawdust'?

Pirate1: That was one of 'em, aye. That's why me mum wasn't right to name me Stumpy McGee.

Pirate2: So, Pirate McPirate ain't your real name then? Always thought it was a bit weird soundin'

Dom says, "Arrrr."

Pirate2: Arr! I spy the new cabin boy! If there's one thing I like better than a short cabin boy, it's a Mancunian one...

Pirate1: No, Pirate McPirate is just me Scots name. It's what the Scottish cabin boy likes to call me when... ooh, look at all that water over there.

Pirate2: Water, aye... you've got a *Scottish cabin boy*? Years I've been pirating and never had a Scottish cabin boy. Not once! Arrr... I'm pissed off now...

Pirate1: Well, you've got that Mancunian with the tongue. I've heard that he 'Arrr''s better 'an any.

Pirate2: Arr, well that's true enough. His arrs are pretty fine arrs. Lovely arrs, he's got all right...

Pirate1: Well, my cabin boy's got a lovely arrs also, just so you know. But it's more of an 'Ahhrrs'.